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Jan 20

poison ivy

Festive jingles brightened every nook and cranny of Calgary, it seemed, during the recent Yuletide stretch.

My house was no exception.

Practically vibrating with excitement and anticipation on Christmas Eve, my nine-year-old son belted out one carol after another.

His Christmas mix didn’t include restful, time-honoured melodies of yore. 911 Song, set to the tune of Jingle Bells, went something like this:

Dashing through the snow, on a pair of broken skis
Over the hills we go, crashing into trees!
The snow is turning red, I think I’m almost dead,
I woke up in the hospital with stitches in my head, oh!
9-1-1, 9-1-1, Santa Claus is dead!

That gem led on to a gleeful rendition of Deck the Halls With Poison Ivy, followed by Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer, all delivered at 110 decibels.  A Silent Night was not in the cards, musically or literally.

My ears were still ringing as 2020, fresh and clear-eyed, took over from a worn-out 2019.

It struck me that Alberta’s pediatricians and family doctors might relate to poor old Grandma., seeing as they got run over by a health minister just before Christmas.  They were caught every bit as flat-footed as the old lady trampled by those reindeer.  After all, they’d had reason to feel secure: Premier Jason Kenney publicly guaranteed that his government would not cut access to care. Read the rest of this entry »